Monday, March 23, 2009

Bulwark

Even the strongest defenses crack over time. 

It came slowly at first; lurking in the shadows it created. A whisper here, a drop of water there. That was then. Today, it's a cacophony and a deluge - there are no breaks, no wanes.

I wonder if the walls were keeping it out, or keeping me in for the past nine years. Was it out there the whole time; lurking in the depths, waiting for its opportunity? Or was it just me in my fortress, alone and high on victory; oblivious to its inevitable recurrance?

Almost a decade, and it all comes crumbling down around me.

Nothing but rubble at my feet and my enemy is all around me. Surrounding me and consuming me.

I don't think the same tricks will work; it's adapted. If I'm going to survive, I will need new weapons and new tactics. I don't have either.

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Where is the line...

...between impulse and addiction?

...between  enjoyment and enslavement?

...does it even exist at all?